The day was long, the night was warm. It’s 9:50PM, offically I have 10 minutes to edit my blog, unoffically I’ll be here until after that time. Today was just awesome. The past three days or so have been awesome though. I’m not sure why, but I think there are a few things I need to address in my life as of late. One of those being *gasp* girls. I spend so much time wishing I had a girlfriend, or wishing I could go out with this or that girl, that sometimes I think I overlook what I need right now. Truth be told, I don’t want to marry when I’m older than 24 or 25. I’m hoping I find the one for me marry before then, of course that’s all in God’s hands (hard as that may sometimes be). I have known for a while now that I need to give this up, but I just want a relationship. I just need a good friend right now too. Sometimes I think I spend too much energy trying to find the one, when I need to just lay it down and let God handle it. I’ve given God my list, God knows who I want. I’m believing He’ll give me just what I want. In fact, I know He will. I’m posting my list in this post because this is exactly who I want in my next girlfriend, my wife.
My Future Wife:
- Â Â
- Must be a Christian.
Â- Loves Christ with all her heart.
- Means what she says when she says she’s a Christian.
- Good morals (ie: no premarital sex)
- Loves everyone and holds nothing against anyone (does not bitterness in her heart against people).
- Does not care for the things of the world, which includes:
- Music
- TV (ie: shows where they talk about nothing but sex, and have nothing but profanity)
- Drugs
- Respect:
- Respects those in authority, and everyone she’s around.
- Respects me, as I respect her.
- Respects HERSELF in her clothing, speech, etc.
- Not jealous of anyone.
- Doesn’t mind moving to other states, and such (obviously after marriage).
- MUST NOT be manipulative (this would be tied into the others also).
Amoung other happy news … I’m happy! I don’t know why I’m happy. It’s not like I’m never happy, but for some reason I’m just happy. It’s diffrent, but awesome. God’s awesome. What’s so awesome is that Jesus died for me because he loved me. He LOVED me! You know sometimes we can push things out of the way and try to not worry or think about them, and when we do that it’s like trying to hide something that’s just not there. It’s like knowing it’s there, but not attending to it. This can be anything, even sins. A sin, purhaps, we don’t want God to know about so we push it out of our mind to try to make God think it’s not there. I know I’m guilty of it. I don’t want to be like that anymore though. I’ve pretty much always been straight up with people. If something looks good I’ll tell them it looks good. If I have something that’s bothering me, I’ll be straight up and tell them. Purhaps, though, just purhaps, I tell everyone else but never tell God those things, and He wants to know those things (much more than the people I tell also).
I was reading this awesome morning about a church not too far from here that made me jealous. Jealous because that’s what I want. So many, so very many, things are happening there. The city sounds just like ours too (a little diffrent, of course). There are drug problems, the works. There church (which is really just a youth group on Tuesdays and Saturdays) is growing. Over 700 people (if I read right). It’s what I want for this area. I’ve asked God why can’t we have that here … and I’m expecting an answer. I think, maybe, that I saw it elsewhere (Colorado Springs) that I’ve been blinded (is that the right word), and I’ve had this mindset that it just cannot happen here. This place is so religious. What, though, what if that wasn’t so much a bad thing for once? What if that is how people start coming? Our generation is searching for something diffrent. We’re tired of the same old same old. We want something real.
Your loves like candy! You take me places that I never dreamed I could go. God is so awesome, things in my life that I never imagined could happen — have happened. God has taken me farther than I could have ever imagined. I can only guess where I would be at if God hadn’t come in (and focusing on that really doesn’t accomplish anything).
I don’t think it would be impossible for you to find a girl like that if you would like my opinion. Of course, I’m a girl and so I don’t look at girls in the same way you do, but I understand what you’re saying. One day you’ll meet that girl though and she’ll be looking for the same thing that you are.
On another note, I know that you don’t know me, but I somehow came across this. I think I was look for something to do with tfk. Maybe it was lyrics, I can’t really remember. I wanted to say though that from what I can see on this site, from what you say here, you sound like a great guy. A strong Christian, and it just inspires me to see you and how you are so open with your faith and everything. I can’t describe it really. Sometimes it seems like everyone has two sides and they could be a perfect Christian at church but when you read something like your journal, there is no way. I’m so tired of that, and it brings me down so much.
Enough of that though, I haven’t even introduced myself. I’m Morgan and if you ever want to talk I would be chsingchckns on aim too.
I started off this just wanting to say I didn’t think it was impossible for you to find a girl like that and went on to get off topic and write quite a lot.