Emotions, Leadership, and Odd Stuff

The days are short, but oh so long.  The time spent complaining fills a bucket.  The point when good looks evil, the problems begin.  There’s just days when it’s so hard to add two plus two together.  Emotions lie but tell the truth.  They aren’t always lying, but they aren’t always telling the truth either.

God’s timing is perfect.  God is perfect.  God is the author and finisher of our faith.  He loves us and molds us and makes us into his image.  After years and years of knowledge, when does the knowledge become the religious?

Why aren’t anyone passionate?  Why is everyone fine with complacancy?  Is it because it means that sin can still run rampent (in some circles, anyway)?  Or is it just because it just means we never have to step out of our comfort zones?  I don’t know.  One thing I love about my church is this: the people there are passionate.  The core of my church, I can actually see in my mind passionately seeking God at every time during the day.

I love the night.  The night is when I can really connect with God in prayer and worship.  It’s so hard to do at 8 o’clock.  It’s so very hard.  I’ve not been able to figure that out.  It’s just how I’m wired.  I think there’s a lot of college aged people that fit into this category though … it’s just the church doesn’t (for the most part) do anything, so it’s used for drinking, sex, and drugs.

I have a passion for …

  • those who feel hopeless.
  • those who feel like no one is there for them.
  • those that don’t know where else to go, or who to turn to.
  • those who are broken (emotionally, spiritually, physically).

I suppose that’s just a small list, but I want to help these people.  I love helping people.  That’s what my “job” essentially is: helping people.

I want to see people whom are passionate about prayer and fasting — who we can all help push each other in.  I don’t want to lead.  Maybe I’m called to lead though.  I think why I don’t want to lead is because I’m so young, look even younger, and am quite (shy? maybe).  I just don’t have much vision of how to run things, though.  Or maybe I do, but I don’t want to jump head first in it.

That said: my passion right now would be to have a weekly corporate prayer time (not once a month, or year, but weekly) between midnight and 2am (or longer, depending on where God leads).

The basic problem with this is this: will ANYONE else catch this vision?  Will there be anyone (besides me) who would like to do this (or even maybe not, but wouldn’t mind doing it just out of love for God and the people of this city)?  Personally, I loved being challenged by others to press deeper into God — ie: fasting.  Even if it were just two or three people.  With fasting it’s hard to challenge myself.

Either way, I’m letting it be known … if I’m supposed to lead, I’ll lead.  I just want a vision, the words (please?), or something so I can move from point A to point B.  Doesn’t matter if it’s bumpy, just matters that it works — and more importantly: if lives are changed.

The Bloody Field

I've been thinking heavily over the past day or two about the church, my city, and the evil surrounding it all.  I guess I'm kind of on the verge of anger and just deep saddness.  One of the things I hate so deeply is the division in the church.  I hate it.  I hate bad theologies that had good meaning (and are even true to an extent).  I hate evil.  I hate the church's passive stance on evil.  When I say passive, I mean they pray a little here and there (does anyone even show up for "prayer meetings"?), but other than that it's just sweep under the rug.  Evil's out there, but we're just supposed to pretend we don't see it — or pretend it's not really that bad.

Here's the truth: there are thousands of people (many church people included) that are in a sea.  They're drowning.  How can I say this?  They're going to hell.  Hell.  What can I do?  This city loves religion.  They cherish it like a fat guy cherish's birthday cake.  Just tradition: nothing more, nothing less.  They go to school, work, and just life in general and they have absolutely no fruits (of the spirit).  They're so blinded.  They think all they have to do is say "Jesus I lub u, come into me hert".  THAT'S NOT WHAT BEING A CHRISTIAN IS!

One theological element I'm talking about here is that of "once saved, always saved".  It's enveloped this city.  They live by it.  It's sending them to hell, too.  They're dying because a church wants membership.  All the while, the enemy is sitting back — enjoying the blind ignorance of the people.

It makes me want to cry.  I hate it.  Then there's denominations.  I'll be overjoyed when it's not "what denomination are you" and instead "are you a Christian, saved by Christ Jesus".  The church isn't the baptist denomination.  It isn't the Methodist church.  Stop playing church politics.  Church isn't a place for politics.  Period.  Politics plays such a large role in church.  I've saw over the years how politics ruin things.

"Once saved, always saved" can be true — to an extent.  Once you're saved, you have to give your life to God.  You'll always be saved IF you keep that.  It's an if-then-else.  Not just a simple if.  If you give God your life and remain in him, then you're always saved; else you're not and you're not of God.  If-then-else.  Remember that.

It's like throwing a life-preserver over a boat and then when the person who needed saving gets the preserver the thrower just lets go of the string and the boat leaves.  What good is it then?!  That's just like planting a seed and never giving it water.  Perhaps another ship will come by, but what if they don't?

In other words, you just planted a seed in that person's heart that they're "eternally secure".  You've just lied to them.  Now they're going off drifting — doing all the things of the world, not set apart at all.  When they die they'll say: "I thought once I was saved, I was always saved".  They'll be denied because of an eternal lie.  Very, very bad.

I've came to the conclusion that this city can't be saved until religion is first broken.  Maybe I'm wrong, I accept it if I am.  Until the walls of religion are broken in this city, it's going to be that much harder to reach the unsaved saved.  They think they're saved — but they aren't.  I'm not judging people.  Those who are really, genuinely seeking God (even though they do screw up all the time) — I'm not talking about them.  I'm talking about the ones who think they're saved, but they can live however they want to during the week.

On the subject of denomination's, we need to live this song by Disciple, I Just Know.  Who cares if we get in the aisles and dance?  Who care's if someone worships a little different?  Who cares if we pace during worship.  Who cares if we raise our hands?  I love a quote I heard a few days ago: "dignity is NOT a fruit of the spirit".

Something else that I never really thought of — back in Jesus day a lot of babies were slaughtered.  The enemy knew Jesus was the one who was to defeat him so he wanted him to die.  He missed, but a great sin had been committed and a lot of innocent babies were slaughtered.  The enemy has been trying to do it again through what's called "abortion".

Revolution.  I've heard that word used by several people over the past few weeks.  Non-Christians are throwing around the word, as are Christians.  All I can say is this — if the non-Christians get their way — there's going to be chaos.  Entire chaos.  Like riot chaos.  There's only a few more years.  The politics have to go.  The pride has to go.  The church has to get back to what it's meant to do — lead people to Jesus.

We — this generation — are tired of luke-warm church.  We want meat.  We're tired of milk.  We're tired of shallow sermons.  We're tired of shallow people.  We've saw more, we know more, we think more.  We're ready to have a dirty faith — a faith that goes all out for Jesus.  We're tired of little games.  We're ready for truth.  We're hungry for truth.  It's not impossible — it may just mean that some peoples egos may get hurt.  A little more humbleness never hurt anyone (minus the one being humbled).  It's a bloody field, are we going to go and help the sick?  Or are we just going to watch them die?  It's a yes or no question.  Not a yes, maybe, or no.


I've been pretty silent on The Da Vinci Code debate. It honestly doesn't interest me that much. If it was historically accurate it does sound like it'd be interesting (although how can you make something that far out accurate?). Honestly, just reading 1st and 2nd Kings is some of the best reading in the world. It's awesome. That's besides the point I'm getting at though. One of the largest reasons why I do not wish to read this book is the fact that is tries to confuse fact with fiction. This is actual a great tactic for governments trying to brainwash someone. If you can confuse someone about what is good and what is evil, your job is MUCH easier. For example: say you wreck your car and it was the other persons fault. Three years later someone writes a fictional book about a situation almost identical to yours but blames it on themselves. The reader knows he was not at fault before the read, but at the end he's confused as to whether or not he was really blameless. Bad example, perhaps, but it works.

The book is number one on Facebook. Aside from the fact that this probably isn't "scientific", it does include a great majority of college students (or once college students). The Bible is number three (below Harry Potter). I'm not too sure how the whole "don't go see this movie" campaign from a large majority in the church went, but honestly it drew a lot of attention to it — good and bad. The church needs to proclaim the authenticity of the Bible (it's authentic, and there's a lot of proof to back it up). I watched something tonight that said the majority of people are ignorant to church history. I couldn't agree more. We've got to know the church history. It's incredibly interesting too. I'm think we'd be surprised at the amount of people who do not know what Protestantism is. That's not even the largest part (in modern church history, I'd say it's close to number one, if not number one). I don't know near as much church history as I'd like.

One side note on this, why isn't many people defending Leonardo Da Vinci? Talk about slander. Everyone who thinks of him now thinks of this book [of lies] as something he thought up. Not good.

I'm thankful for those who are there that give encouragement. Everyone has bad days (weeks, and months), and we all need people here to encourage us. Sometimes I feel like I'm not reaching anyone, but then I'm proven wrong. A few weeks (or months) ago I was wondering if E-Blah even reached anyone with the credits. Not too much later, I got an e-mail from a guy who said that it planted a seed. Even if it didn't do much, it led to something.

We should all be encourager's. I want to be an encouragement to people. Someway. Somehow. I love just listening to people, maybe that's some encouragement to someone. It encourages me sometimes when I've got something going on. I love just helping people. Several weeks ago we had an in class assignment that I knew and understood pretty well. I could have left 30 minutes early or so, but instead decided to stay and help the those that sat around me that did not understand it. I'm not saying that for credit, but this is what we, as Christians, should do. If we have a talent, we should use it … sometimes it causes discomfort. We are supposed to live selfless lives. Would I have really missed those 30 minutes? Not really. I would have got home that much sooner. Lame excuse for not helping someone, I think.

The Fine Line Between Good and Evil

We, as Christians, are not called to tolerance. We're not. We're not called to tolerate sin. Love the sinner, hate the sin. We're supposed to love the sinner. WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO tolerate the sin. It burns me up every time I hear the word tolerance used in this context. We're not suppose to tolerate sin — especially in the church. The Bible speaks DIRECTLY against homosexuality. It speaks directly against murder (abortion IS murder). It speaks directly against many other evils, also. We're not supposed to hate the sinner, but love them.  That CANNOT be interchanged with sin.  We're not suppose to tolerate the sin.  Period.  We're not suppose to tolerate it.  There is a line between good and evil, and tolerating sin is not right.  It's a lie — from the enemy. Evil. We, as Christians should be producing fruit.  The Bible says that we should have the fruits of the spirit in our lives (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self-control — hint: that's 8 items, learn them, know them, grow in them).  One fear of mine is that we've became so politically correct — so blinded — that we can't see truth right in front of our faces. There is a line between good and evil — how many see it?  How many are blinded?

I need to make one note: this is mainly within the church, not outside so much.  By no means should we harm anyone because of their beliefs (such as what happened in the Selam Witch Trials, etc). 

Finally, remember that people are watching you no matter what you do as a believer.  A stern warning from Jesus: "… If anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea." (Matthew 18:6 NIV).

Last note: this was written around noon Saturday and I'm just cleaning it up before posting.  I wanted to get a reader to check this before posting this time.  Oh, and I have spell check now … perhaps it'll help?

The Stand

Tonight while I was praying, I had this thought come to my mind … We, as Americans, watch a lot of TV, movies, whatever. I've pretty much resigned myself from almost all forms of media (big reason is that I do not really have the time). Here's an analogy (I think that's what it is) — if you have someone you care for very (very!) deeply and you see them hurt, what would your reaction be? The first thing that comes to my mind is how a man is (or should be) protective of his wife. If someone calls her an ugly name (or they disrespect her and/or her name) for most guys they would be very displeased (aka: very angry!). So here's the analogy — so very often we're doing the same thing to God! So often we go and do things that disrespects Him and His name. Instead of being angry about it, we just sit by and are basically saying, "Oh well, that's just how the culture is". That's how the culture is, perhaps. That's NOT how we, as Christians should live though. We're not supposed to be of the world. We're called to be what the world calls radical. Am I saying live in ignorance to the world around you? No. Just because you've not watched a movie, DOES NOT make you ignorant (maybe "deprived of culture"). If you're called to the media industry — great. Do what God has called you to do, BUT make sure you help build HIS Kingdom not your kingdom (because it will fade away — you're going to die!). When you stand before God — would you have a life without any lasting stain or blemish (sure, there's sins — but we're supposed to be trying to become like Christ!).

This can be taken further too. Even with video games. I spent 30+ hours over a 30 day period (maybe it was closer to 15 days). That, truely, was a total waste of time. I got temporary joy and fulfilment out of it. It's not badin moderation (an hour or two every week or two, perhaps?). If that's someone's ministry and it's fruitful and is what God called them to do, then that's great (this is NOT an excuse for going and playing a game though, if that's an excuse it's no more than foolishness and God can see right through it). So many times, I went and played that game hour upon hour when I could have done ANYTHINGbetter than that. There's a world out there going to hell. Plain. Harsh. Truth. I was literally spending hour upon hour doing that when I could have been praying for those people (intersession). They NEED Christ! That's all I want. Until my entire city is shouting "The Stand" from the rooftops — I can't give up. We can't give up. That's the plain simple truth. If it means giving up everything we have, we've got to do it. There may not be much time left. In an split second we could be wiped off the face of the earth and put into eternity. One blink of an eye. Eternity. Stroke. Car wreck. Gunshot. Sudden unexplained death. An instant. What will people remember you by? Will they be able to say, "S/he was the one who was radical for God. They did nothing else but stay in constant worship and prayer"? "Man is like to vanity: his days are as a shadow that passeth away." (Psalm 144:4) A shadow that passes away. Just a shadow. In the span of time (speculating it's around 8,000 years), our lives (speculating we'll live to be 80 years) accounts for about 1% of the entire timespan of all life. One percent. And for a lot of us, we won't live as long as 80 years. A lot less than 1% of the entire span of earth life time. In a moment — gone.

The truth is — if I don't do what He has called me to do (if it's just to pray), God will find someone else to do it. God found someone else to lead His people when King Saul disobeyed God (countless times). God came to the little nobody — the man after God's own heart — David — to lead his people. The linage of Saul was severed. David was a nobody, the least of his family, yet through his linage came Jesus.
Something to think about …

"The Stand", Hillsong United: United We Stand:

You stood before creation
Eternity in Your hand
You spoke the earth into motion
My soul now to stand

You stood before my failure
And carried the cross for my shame
My sin weighed upon Your shoulders
My soul now to stand
So what could I say?
And what could I do?
But offer this heart oh God
Completely to You

So I'll walk upon salvation Your spirit alive in me
This life to declare Your promise
My soul now to stand
So what could I say?
And what could I do?
But offer this heart oh God
Completely to You

I'll stand
With arms high and heart abandoned
In awe of the one who gave it all
I'll stand
My soul Lord to You surrender it
all I am is Yours

I want to credit this blog with the lyrics.

Also, I wanted to add this: "Eternity", Misty Edwards

Eternity's eternal song, is calling me,
Is drawing me away, it's calling me away

All flesh is grass, fading away.
Only You last, only You remain the same,
You never change.
Holy, holy, holy, You are fairer than then sons of men

Surely man is like the flower of the field,
And life is but a vapor, at best but a vapor.
Surely man is like a flower of the field,
And the fragrance but a vapor, at best but a vapor.

But you O God, are better than a thousand blooms.
Hallelujah Amen!

Ah, longer than I wanted this to be, and later than I wanted to go …

Church Media and New CD’s

The hardest part of writing on my blog is trying to come up with a good opening paragraph.  So I may just go random thoughts.  I bought the new Passion CD, “Everything Glorious” this morning.  I was going to get it last night, but iTunes has some issues I believe.  I bought (not yet received) the old Misty Edwards CD, “Eternity“.  None of the music services had it, nor did any of my main shops (ChristianDiscs.com and iTunes).  I’ve got one song from PureTracks.com, and must say they’re pretty good too.  They have the new Hillsong United CD for $9.99 (while iTunes has it at $19.99).  There’s a DVD with it if it’s bought in packaging though, so I may not buy it right away.

On Sunday I went searching for more free multimedia and videos for church and found two resources.  One requires that your church (or a member?) register.  I’ve not registered.  However, the other does not.  Vine Resources is the one which does not require any registration.  The other is LifeChurch.tv (interview with why they do this).  I just thought that someone could use these for their own church (without searching all over the internet for them like I did).  The second source (LifeChurch.tv), has their resources as videos (NTSC and PAL formats) and Adobe Photoshop images (not really sure about anything else, or how these are downloaded since I’ve not registered).  That’s why we started MinistryTalk.com — we believe in free resources (services in this case) for churches.  By the way, the church sermons section is reopened and we are taking new applications on first come, first serve basis.  For information, check this page.

The Battle

An interesting event took place over the weekend. The Battle Cry event took place. I have no idea what happened at the event (I’m sure it was awesome). A very interesting event took place, though, durring the event:

Twenty-five thousand evangelical Christians demonstrated against TV sex and violence in San Francisco this weekend. But that didn’t go down well with the city council, which passed a resolution condemning the rally as an “act of provocation” to negatively influence what the council called America’s “most tolerant” city.

The group, called “Battle Cry for a Generation,” uses the Bible to counter what it calls corrupting influences in the media. But the San Francisco Chronicle reports that about 50 counter-protesters denounced the gathering as a “fascist mega-pep rally.” And San Francisco’s State Representative Mark Leno called the Christians loud, obnoxious, and disgusting, adding, “they should get out of San Francisco.”

Source: Fox News

There’s two main points that really interested me. One: attention was drawn (national, as this was on The O’Reilly Factor). Two: the enemy has his eye on this and is not happy and he’s terrified (because he’s already been defeated and WE WIN/WE’VE ALREADY WON). There’s rarely a time when you see this happen (protesting against a Christian event). Things are happening that can’t be stopped. There’s a lot of prayer and intersession now that just can’t go unheard. I believe time’s running out. It’s almost midnight. We can’t stay in limbo and watch everyone else — we’ve got to act. We’ve got to pray. There is going to be more than just a few [secular] defections …